Labour Day

Another year of employee off day! What to do le?
I guess just stay at home, walk around, clean up old house, or read some books!
What a boring day I could think of....

Sigh.....

Muahaha

Selfish tot :
If u willing to work hard for the past few years, I guess we are married?
Muahaha... Damn!

Goodbye

By Debra Ayis, Nigeria



Tears fill my eyes
In this world of goodbyes
As I look down this rugged cliff.
Years have passed
When to this cliff I cleaved
As the water hits jagged rocks
My life seems to have reached its dock
This pen seems my only solace
In a life once filled with laces
The very finest in the province
A life I lived through providence
Here there is no second chance
It is all but a solitary dance.
I do not see an escape
Unless I be mercifully saved
I felt so much as to dive
Headlong down this cliff
Right where my existence would cease
Now I do find peace
Where I knew despair
My very own steps I retrace
As I rethink my decision
I instead choose a vision
To face life’s mountains
Conquering whatever life may bring
Not by my strength alone
But on Him who has overcome the world.

(Jesus said), “I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” —John 16:33

This is from ODJ, and it always read my heart. Thank u Lord for knowing me so well.

Today's feeling

Today, my heart was kinda sad. Don't know why. I'm so negative of all things and I'm not really in mood to work. After some lil crazy chat with someone, I became more crazzy..
I can't really concentrate on work for the first time. Thoughts running wild in brain. Not working but just lingering around at work place. I felt bad for what I'm doing. Even my boss is like that.
Haha.. Funny and crazy crazy went through a day.
But around night time, I'm kinda happy and being positive again because I received his message, all the way from Bangkok. Not to say I'm worried or anything. Just the heart so down without a word from him. I jump my face into joy. I really could feel that myself. I just felt I couldn't make it without him even though i told myself to stay strong.
But most of all thank u Ed, for your support. Kindy appreciated. U did cheer me up, but not so much. At least  the cheer is there. Tears drop again when u cheer me up. Thanks.

I'm declaring I won't give up on anything for now! I will stay strong for now. I will try to pursue what I feel like is mine! Thanks my dear and people around.

upzdatez and bad updates...

:) Is been extreme long time that I didn't log in to see whatzzup!!
Seconds, Minutes, Hours, Days, Weeks, Months, and even Years past fast.
Here has been half a year I didn't update.
Well, I'm still fine and good. (I guess) just a bit poor due to big whole in the pocket.
It doesn't hurt physically much... Just heart hurt mostly.
Many things running around like cats and dogs, that makes troubles and affected my life again.
Family problem, financial, studying, works, and partly myself.

Sigh....
Will God willing to change my everything I been through to a better one?
I'm really exhausted and tired to face the world.
Or can I just hide in the cave to ask God to come and save me?
Can God grant me a good family? A peaceful family with easy and perfect going family?
Can God give me the best boyfriend of all? or give me the best husband that I could meet now?
Can God provide me rich financially? Not to suffer to see when will I be enough to use?
Can God provide me a car?
Can God let me continuously study without worrying of financial problem? And score well in my exam?
Can God make me have a smooth and finding customer easily in my working area? SO that I could earn extra and helps to build a happy home to all?
Can God calm my heart and not to think too much of others? Heart wilding.. >.<

Sigh....
Sister has been asking me y do i sign so much. I just couldn't explain much. Mouth just can't smile. Too much depressed.